Signs of Low Self-Esteem and Tips to Overcome Them
A person who suffers from low self-esteem does not feel capable of doing things and, as a result, ends up losing countless opportunities for growth in various areas of life, hindering their development.
Low self-esteem is closely linked to the difficulty of self-acceptance and the lack of self-knowledge. Insecure individuals, who have difficulty accepting their mistakes and fail to recognize and value their potential, develop a great fear of rejection and are in the habit of comparing themselves with other people.
Check out some of the main signs of low self-esteem below:
Low self-esteem: symptoms to look out for
When we have low self-esteem, we will tend to think negatively about ourselves and our abilities, so it will be more difficult for us to achieve our personal goals and objectives. Also, it can cause us problems with anxiety, stress, and depression. Specifically, the symptoms of low self-esteem are:
1. Use of self-criticism
People with low self-esteem tend to constantly seek their faults, which are not so easily forgiving and feel bad.
2. Constant sadness and mood swing
These people often feel alone and not valued by the people around them. Sadness and mood swings for other better times are the most frequent states of such an individual.
Fears can have two functions: paralyze or activate people. People with low self-esteem tend to remain paralyzed by the fear of being judged, that others do not like them, or they are performing badly, etc.
4. Feeling insecure
The fear of not being loved or accepted by others makes them feel insecure about themselves and what they do. Therefore, they will tend to do things that they do not like to please others and get the affection they so badly need. It will often be difficult for them to say “no.”
5. Search for perfection
Also, to win others’ affection or avoid being criticized, they tend to be very demanding of everything they do to seek perfection.
6. Feelings of incompetence
Being very insecure people who seek perfection, faced with new challenges, they will be paralyzed by the fear that they will not succeed and will be criticized by others; this leads them to feel incompetent.
7. And in love?
When these people have a relationship, exaggerated jealousy will surface due to the fear of being abandoned or not being enough for the other person. It is also difficult for them to leave their partner if they feel that the relationship is not working, for fear of being alone and not finding anyone else who loves them.
Most frequent causes of low self-esteem
Now, what can these thoughts of low self-esteem be due to? Often the answers can be found in the past of that person with low self-esteem; this could be due to negative experiences that they have had since childhood regarding physical appearance, intelligence, and social or family relationships, among others. We must be careful with the messages that we transmit to our children, family, or friends of the type: “You are clumsy,” “You do nothing well,” “Put something else you are very ugly,” “Don’t be that stupid…” These messages can penetrate the person and create insecurities that can drag them for life and diminish their self-esteem. We can also have low self-esteem because our parents had shown us little affection when we were small or because they have overprotected us.
What are the consequences of poor self-esteem?
We believe that self-esteem is the key factor that will determine their success or failure in life, and the lower the person’s self-esteem; the more distant they are from having a happy life.
Also, the person starts to lose productivity in several areas of life; it is common to see a drastic reduction in the quality of relationships, finances, and health.
Again, when the person has low self-esteem, he is not accepting himself, loving himself; in other words, he is rejecting his being. From this, the person starts to attract situations that will generate more pain and difficulty for his life; he enters a cycle of suffering that can lead to a deep depression; that is, if the person does not break this vicious cycle, he can go to a path of no return.
Tips for raising self-esteem and trusting yourself more
To strengthen your self-esteem, it is essential to look at yourself and get closer to your essence. Whoever invests in self-knowledge becomes able to deal with their negative characteristics and is always trying to improve them. In this way, the individual can avoid the wear and tear generated by the difficulty of self-acceptance, as he channels his energy in favor of personal improvement.
Stop comparing yourself
Understand that each individual has their characteristics and life history. Avoid comparing yourself with others and think that each one has their time to accomplish, develop, and achieve the goals.
Stop being hard on yourself
Avoid criticizing yourself excessively and condemning yourself all the time for your failures and difficulties. Be careful with perfectionism and the need always to be the best and please all the time. To make mistakes is important and part of the learning process of every human being. Reflect on your mistakes healthily and look for alternatives to act the next time differently, without letting mistakes erode your self-esteem.
Focus on your potentials
When you are focused on the negative aspects of your characteristics, insecurity will certainly be present in the individual’s routine and relationships. Therefore, always value your qualities, achievements, and successes.
Remember your achievements
Throughout life, everyone stumbles and makes mistakes. Despite this, achievements are also present. Therefore, when you feel incapable and insecure, remember everything you have already achieved and be proud of your path.
Rethink your beliefs
Some patterns of thinking and behavior can be paralyzing in an individual’s life. Realizing which of these limiting beliefs keep you from moving forward and doing certain things you would like to do is critical to stop insecurity and the feeling of incapacity. Try to identify how these beliefs settled within you so that you can dissolve them.
One of the techniques used in therapy is called “Positive Journaling.” This consists of having a notebook or diary where you write down ten good things that the day has had each day before going to sleep. Reflecting on your day’s good things will make you appreciate more the little things that we often overlook.
Don’t beat yourself up in the pursuit of happiness
In these times of perfect Instagram lives, we tend to look for just that. Live thousands of adventures every day and wear our best smiles. And this kind of life is incredible, but it is not really like this every day. Because those people who upload perfect photos, we don’t know what their day to day is like, what they think about before going to sleep or just when they wake up. Value all the good things you have in your life and fight to improve it, but don’t get frustrated trying to find permanent happiness; because happiness is not a state, it is moments. Instead, appreciate the feelings of inner peace and tranquility in your day-to-day life because this is a state that can be prolonged over time.
And finally, if you have anxiety problems that prevent you from living a life in serenity, seek psychological help whenever you need it.